I would like to welcome Lance Gunberg and post his open letter to Carnival Corporation, Senior Cruise Director John Heald, Heidi heald and Stephanie Leavitt.

Lance Gunberg

Lance Gunberg

I respectfully submit an open letter to Carnival Corporation, Senior Cruise Director John Heald, Heidi Heald and the unprecedented Queen of the Blog, Stephanie Leavitt.
We, the members of  the Evil Krewe of King Ed, the Big, have been waiting patiently on pins and needles (as well as chairs and sofas) for some (ANY) news on the upcoming Bloggers Cruise 2, leaving the port of New Orleans on the 7th of February, 2009.
The day of departure is fast approaching and still, nary a peep from our “peeps” at Carnival. Whatever could they be up to?
We religiously (and non-religiously) check John’s blog on a daily basis, awaiting a blurb, a byte, a bit, or even a morsel of information concerning the upcoming cruise. Oh, sure… there have been hints galore, but what are hints really? Merely a tease. The moment John even hints at a BC Version 2.0 activity or event, our collective inboxes begin to overflow with speculation as to the nature of the event or activity.
Well, I am here to throw down the gauntlet. (I can do that because I am SIR LANCELOT!) Although I really haven’t had to USE a gauntlet for some time now. Really, ever since Guinevere left it out in the rain and it rusted, it’s been in the bottom of my underwear drawer. But I digress…Please give us something. ANYTHING!
Help us, Stephie-Wan Kenobe… you’re our only hope!
You should see our inboxes. Well, maybe you shouldn’t. This crew (Krewe) has been filling time by sending out emails concerning every bit of minutiae of everyday life, biding the time until we get some real “meat and potatoes” from the folks of Carnival.
What might that minutiae be, you ask? Well, if I have to open another email with a question about “removing a stain from a family credenza” or “please send this email out to at LEAST ten people in your contacts or a terrible plague will befall you” or “does any of the crew know a good remedy for chronic flatulence?”… I mean REALLY. Enough is enough.
Honestly, I can’t take it anymore! I beseech thee (Again, I can say “beseech” because I am Sir Lancelot), John, Heidi, Stephanie, or whomever else is reading this blog spot. PULEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE send us all out an inkling, a tidbit, a morsel, a CRUMB of information about our anxiously awaited Bloggers Cruise II. Help to restore the sanity of this crew. Like a person lost at sea, we are in dire need of a drink of fresh water.
I fear that if we don’t hear something to whet our collective appetites soon, I will be forced to flood your inboxes with a chain letter that, if not passed on to at LEAST 10 people in your contacts, will cause your teeth to rot, your bottom to develop chronic boils and your computer to start playing “It’s a Small World” repeatedly AT HIGH VOLUME, until you are compelled to jam knitting needles into your eardrums for some blessed relief.
Guest blogger on Big Ed’s Carnival Blog…
Sir Lancelot.
PS… Pretty please with a cherry on top?
No, really. Something? ANYTHING??
Thank You Lance. I hope this gets seen by all those you addressed this open letter to.


Filed under bloggers cruise, CARNIVAL CRUISE LINES, Cruising, OPEN LETTERS, TRAVEL


  1. Good luck Sir Lancelot. I hope your letter is read by the powers that be and they will fulfill your request ASAP.
    Countess Carolyn…..anxiously awaiting any and all news.
    PS please don’t send me any of those emails, I don’t need the bubonic plague or the boils of evil on my bottom…… 🙂

  2. InMN253

    Thank you, Sir Lancelot. I hope they respond to your plea!


  3. Ray McTeague

    Sir Lancelot wields his mighty pen to paper like a powerful swordsman in battle, before the unspeakable, let us pray Queen Heidi and Damsel Stephanie convince King John to release the hounds…..

    Nice job Lance…

  4. CruisinSue

    Lance……Perfect again…LOL I hope they come through soon for I will be landing in NOLA on Feb 5th around 4pm ready to get down to it (Whatever it may Hope we hear something soon.

    Gloria aka Sue

  5. Those who do good work will always receive the highest praise.

  6. lance you’ve still got it my friend! we leave tomorrow and will be on the fantasy saturday for five days. i will blog from the ship. stay tuned for the new changes from the drydock and sarge’s poker game!

    hope you get news soon. oh, and no pox on my butt either please! ha ha ha

    smiles, bee


    Bee, Is this the first cruise for the New Fantasy? We will want to hear and see all about it on your blog.

  7. Princess Susan

    Sir Lancelot,
    Loved your letter…but knitting needles? That’s going a bit to far…LOL.

    Can you please fix John’s laptop to play It’s A Small World? I just know how much he loves it!

    If I could only use the mighty pen like you can Sir Lancelot!

    Princess Susan….holding the cutest little week old baby girl.

  8. suemuller

    Sir Lancelot,
    I have never met you, but your “stories” crack me up!!! Hope they hear ya! I too am getting just a wee bit tired of all the, what shall we call them… “chain” mails with all these dire “consequences”, if we don’t send them on. I am waiting for the day I open my inbox to find 15,000 plus emails, 14,999 of them chain mails or attached pictures, that take me 2 hrs each to open because my pc is soooo slooowww… ;D …Anyway can’t wait to meet you and Ilda, and the rest of EVERYONE in February!

  9. The Flying Dutchman

    An eloquent appeal with nuances of wit and sarcasm. Couldn’t have said it better myself. Very nice!

    Any allusion to or indication of any information pertaining to BC2NOLA would be greatly appreciated. I really hope that the Carnival powers that be hear your plea for DETAILS….. There are many faithful bloggers out here chomping at the bit for any shred of information.

  10. The Bears - Barb & Carl

    Sir Lancelot,
    I am humbled! You’re words never fail! Once again, you have come to rescue us!
    Now let’s hope the right people read this letter, so that we don’t have to call out the flying monkeys!!!
    Princess Barb

    (knitting needles???? Can I just use Q-tips instead?)

  11. Princess Elaine

    Sir Lancelot,
    Once again, you have outdone us all with your mighty words. Here’s hoping we hear something soon.
    Knitting needles? Ouch! “It’s A Small World”? Classic!
    Princess Elaine, the quiet and STILL single

  12. Kevin

    Great letter, I hope your luggage doesn’t go for a swim and your cabin has a toilet that works. IF any of this happens please see ED he has plenty of room



  13. Pingback: JOHN HEALD HITS 3,000,000 HITS « “BIG” ED KONEFE

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